Jonathon's ORAMM

On the morning of July 23, 2006, my Father, Kristin and I all jumped in the car at approximately 5:40am. Our destination was Old Fort, NC so I could participate in the ORAMM. On the way, Kristin and I chatted while my dad bounced around in the back seat elated to see his son participate in this wonderful event. This was his first time to see me race.

We arrived in plenty of time until I realized that I had to stand in two lines for quite some time. One line to register and one line to use a port let. This took me right up to 7:45 and the race started at 8:00. Slightly rushed, I packed my camel bak and changed clothes. I found myself huddled close to people I know and surrounded by 369 people at the start of the Assault. This race is HUGE and pulls people as far away as Japan to race.

As we were all talking smack in the group, I realized I had already made my first mistake of the day. I forgot to put tubes in my pack. Ohhhh crappage. I knew I had a ton of air pressure in my tires so I just left it and figured I could make it to rest stop two where more tubes, my Father and Kristin would be waiting.

It was time to start riding. ON YOUR LEFT! People deal with stress and nervous energy in many different ways, or so I have read. Apparently, I deal with these things by utilizing humor. So this is how I always handle the start of a mountain bike race, with humor. So “ON YOUR LEFT” is what I started yelling as soon as the cop car sounded “wup whoop” to signal the beginning of the race. Of course I knew I couldn’t get around those 200 some odd people in front of me but I wanted them to know I meant business. So off we went into the backcountry of the Grandfather district.

Things in the beginning were pretty uneventful. Once we made it to the first single track climb Kitsuma, people were pretty stacked and I walked most of the switchbacks. Once on top we were headed for our first downhill. I was following about thirteen people and had about five or six behind me. After descending for about a minute, I heard “Could I get by, thanks, could I get by thanks. . .” After about five of these, I heard a girl behind me requesting to get by. I said “You can get by when I get by.” I think this made everyone nervous because when the trail opened up for a second everyone in front of me parted as though Moses was commanding them and the rider directly in front of me tried to negotiate the passes and ran into a tree. I buzzed by them all and never heard from behind me again.

I had put a new tire on my back wheel and even at high pressure it was gripping nicely. Just please don’t let it go flat. I passed the first rest stop without stopping headed onto number two. Some more ascending and descending and then a long gravel road to rest stop two where I stopped to fill up on water. I took off up the road and saw Kristin and my Dad waiting. My Father had been diligently working for my cause.Yahooo I can get some tubes. I chatted for a second got some tubes and was on my way into the hardest section of the course, the hellacious climb up Curtis Creek road.

Some folks and myself had all climbed this road two weeks prior. Here are some of the warriors. Joe, Russ, Jamie (in back). The climb was what it was. A looooong climb. I made it to the top and then started the next gravel downhill followed by another four mile climb. Once I made it to the top of this climb I rested a little longer and chatted with Eric Wever (Pisgah Adventure Mountain Bike Race promoter) who was volunteering at rest stop four. As I started to take off I saw my dad walking down toward the rest stop and knew they must be parked further up the parkway. I rode a half mile and saw Kristin chilling by the car awaiting my arrival once more. Nice legs eh?I stopped and got the last of my gels and some cold water then headed on up to Hearbreak.

A long downhill awaited me and I was flying down this trail. I never stopped to let any air out of the tires because you don’t fix somethin’ that ain’t broke. So I passed a few people going down, or I should say they let me by. I had a nice groove going when I spotted a Budweiser about 13 feet off the trail down a STEEP slope. So I did what anyone would do, I planted my front wheel into two fallen trees and did a mid-air cartwheel followed by an ass/back rail slide to see if the beer was cold. Once I had blazed a new cave through some foliage I realized that I was just seeing a mirage. I found a slightly easier path going back up and crawled my way back to the trail. I yanked my bike from the thickets and surveyed for damage and on down down down. Once I made it to the bottom of Heartbreak I failed to see a directional arrow and was greeted by a group of boy scouts that were all pointing back the way I came as though they were “Uncle Sam” himself. The boy scouts want “YOU” to go the right way.

Luckily this year when I went back across the railroad tracks I didn’t encounter a 10 minute wait for one of these steel beasts. So I was back to rest stop five and all I needed to do was a relatively easy fire road climb back to Kitsuma and the finish. As I got back to the single track of Kitsuma, I hopped off my bike to walk it up the switchbacks. The trail starts right next to I-40 and there were two truckers working on their rig as I got off. I made eye contact and the one not working said “How many maaaales is your’all’s trail?” I responded “Sixty-Five miles.” He said “HOLY $#!@.”

The climb up was slow and the ride down was fun. Back out onto the asphalt and headed to the finish. It was great fun and an awesome time. I cut 47 minutes off last year’s time for a whopping 9 hours and 3 minutes finish time. The Assault is great and it hurts. I was so glad to have some of the people I love there and for them to see me finish. So thanks to all who volunteered, came out, hung out, took pictures, yelled and all that jazz.

Super awesome kudos to Kristin and Jack LaRoy, YOU GUYS ROCK! Post Race interview below:So in the post interview conducted by Kristin Jean Elliot:Kristin “So Jonathon how did completing the Assault two years in a row make you feel?”Jonathon “UUUrrrrrrrrrrrrrrppppppppp.” Kristin “Would you like to cleanse your stanky butt before answering any more questions?”

Jonathon “Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee”